I am a huge fan of euphemisms. For my illiterate friends (wait how could they read this blog if they were illiterate? Hmmm…too deep, never mind.), a euphemism is a indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing.  We Americans are notorious euphemizers. For instance instead of calling it a toilet, we use the word restroom. While we can all agree it sounds sweeter, there is most certainly no resting going on in the toilet.  Americans have euphemize the hell out of everything. Why? Because it is our culture to cover or shine the dirty,ugly and unpleasant. Why the lecture on euphemisms? Because I have found a fantastic time waster called:

The Euphemism Generator

This site has given me euphemisms beyond my wildest dreams! Little gems such as:

• I couldn’t believe my best friend was actually whipping the proverbial royal ferret.
• You should have seen your face! You looked like you were training the wookie.
• Will you stop digging the butter?!
• Alone once again, she retired to the bedroom and began flirting with the wet sheriff.
• As the kids say, she was ruining the heat-seeking sweet potatoes

And an oldie but a goodie…

• Will you stop inspecting the coconut cream turtle?!